by Candace Allixendir, Sweet Memories
Keeping the Peace – How Key Messages Can Help You
As a wedding planner with a background in Public Relations, there are a number of skills that I draw on from my years as a communication consultant: being organized, seeing the big picture while keeping the tiniest detail in mind, and of course, event planning.
What has surprised me most is how my media training has crept into my work on weddings, translating into constructing key messages for my clients to help them keep the peace.
What are key messages?
Quite simply, key messages are communication points that reinforce your position. They help you clearly convey your message.
Below are two examples of the challenges faced by many brides and the key messages I recommend to navigate “meddling moms” and “battling bridesmaids”.
We all know and love her, but managing mom’s ideas, opinions and dreams for your wedding can be challenging. To help you manage mom, here are a few easy to use messages:
- I know this is a big day for both of us
- Mom, you have probably been dreaming about this day for even longer than I have
- I love and value your opinion
- I love how excited you are and appreciate all of your ideas but we may not be able to all of them
- It is really important that the wedding day is a reflection of <insert fiancà©’s name> and I
- Your ideas are great and while I’m sure we will be able to incorporate some of them along the way, we really want the wedding to reflect our relationship and personalities
They are your closet friends, siblings and relatives and you cannot imagine your big day without them by your side. But what happens when two of your bridesmaids are not getting along? Sit them down separately for a heart-to-heart and here are a few things you can say to (hopefully) end the battle of the bridesmaids.
- Our relationship means the world to me
- When I picture my big day, I cannot imagine it without you by my side
- I really need your support right now
- We have been through thick and thin and ups and downs together and we have always supported one another
- I know it may be a challenge, but I really need you to get along with <insert name>
- I know you do not always see eye-to-eye with <insert name>, but just like you she means the world to me and I cannot imagine my day without her either
- I’ve pictured this time full of excitement, laughter and happiness
- You're getting along with <insert name> will ensure I’m a bouncing, happy bride
Communication is key
No matter the challenge, keep the lines of communication open. Shutting out family or friends will not make the problems go away; by keeping the lines of communication open, you have a better chance to maintain perspective and understand their concerns so you are better prepared to deal with them.
If you plan on preparing your own key messages, keep three things in mind:
- Keep your messages clear and concise
- Ensure you stay positive
- Key messages are always honest
Best of luck!