By: Ashley Farrell, WPICC of Velvet Bordeaux Events
When it comes to taking the plunge and following your true destiny, it comes down to two major factors; being able to change your mindset from limiting your ability to dream, and following through with your plans by executing a flawless business strategy. It’s scary, change and the unknown are terrifying things and when you are about to venture into new territory, your inner saboteur can sometimes take over. We are all guilty of putting things off whether it be a phone call to a family member, a visit with a friend, or leaving your day job to fully launch your own personal business. I’m here to let you know that the fear is nothing in comparison to the fulfillment you will get from truly taking the plunge and following your destiny.
At the end of the day, you were meant for bigger things and you know it! A simple rewiring of your mindset to start acting on your plans, rather than constantly putting them off, is just the start of a new beginning. Your focus becomes target-based and you are determined to do more, your business strategy is the map that helps you get to the end of this challenge – to reach the biggest reward you could ever imagine.
Stop saying “I will” and start saying “I am”
So many times we have been haunted by the dreadful “I will”. I will do that later, I will finish this tomorrow, I will call them next week. How many times did you put it off until you just didn’t do it at all? Or an even more loaded question; how many times did you put it off until it was too late?
We create this dialogue in our minds that sometimes hold us back from doing what needs to be done. For instance, you are ready to start your journey of being a business owner, running your own personal empire and being your own boss, but you are still holding on to that 9-5 job. In the beginning, it was easy to juggle the two, you were dipping your toes in the water to test the temperature while still keeping the rest of your body on land. And just when you thought it was as simple as jumping in and getting wet or staying dry on land, you suddenly find yourself at that fork in the road where you need to decide which path you are going to take; the road to “I will get to it” or “I am doing it”.
It comes down to the basic science of training your mindset to replace one word with another and then acting upon that word. Okay, I know, easier said than done but humans are a species of patterns and after doing it enough times it becomes a habit. As cliché as it is, we might not have tomorrow, so why are you holding back? Train yourself every day to start making real moves towards your goals, something as simple as a morning affirmation; “I am a successful business owner, I am a finisher, I am brave enough to follow my destiny” go a long way and make a bigger impact than you think! Stop telling yourself that you have all the time in the world to reach those stars because if you keep doing that, you will be passed by others and there won’t be any stars left for you to grab. The greatest weapon we can give ourselves is belief, belief in what we do, who we are and where we are supposed to be.
The hard facts are that the gruesome “I will” is an excuse to avoid doing something that could really make a ripple in the world, why? Because you are scared.
Don’t Be Scared
It is easy to be afraid of the unknown, it’s easy to look at it and say it’s too frightening, but what about the brave characters that we all learned about and dreamed of becoming in those childhood storybooks? Whatever happened to “grabbing a bull by the horns and staring it straight in the eyes”? When did we suddenly get so timid? When it comes to following your dreams, I get it, it can be daunting, it can be so terrifying to go into the unknown…but hey, if Elsa can do it, I think you can too! *cue Frozen II song “Into The Unknown”.*
Fear holds us back from a lot of things. For the purpose of this article, I want to talk about the fear that paralyzes us from leaving our day jobs, the fear that hinders us from blossoming into the entrepreneurs we dream about becoming and building the life we are meant to have. Imagine yourself standing on the edge of a rocky cliff above what looks to be an infinite abyss. You slip. Now your body is dangling above a gaping hole that is so deep it might not even have an end. Your fingers grasp on tightly to the sandy rocks as your legs flail about, you know that by letting go you are taking a risk, and in your mind, a risk that could result in failure. The truth is, the only failure you will face is the one of not taking the risk as all. Part of you is yelling to let go and take the chance while the other part is begging you to rely on that safety net because there’s no way someone like you could make it…so you continue to hold on. If you allow yourself to give in to those voices that bring you down, that keeps you grounded instead of lifting you up then you are allowing the worst part of you to take control of your life. You need to understand that failure is not a bad thing, failure is that step that gets you closer to achieving what you set out to do – failure is but a mere puddle in an ocean of possibilities and you’re out there on your yacht taking in the view on your way to your new reality.
There is no real reason to be scared, your entire life is already the unknown, this is just one aspect of it. But, if you are scared, know that it is okay because with a positive mindset you can channel that fear into motivation, into a challenge, into possibility.
So, it’s time you let go.
You Are Meant to do Bigger Things
You have to believe that you are here to play a bigger role, that you are here to not only create a life for yourself but to also change the lives around you. You had a vision that brought you to this place, that made you want to work hard to be more; no one dreams to be mediocre. You have the dream, you envision it daily, now its time to get your strategy in place.
This can be difficult because working on a strategy to start your business and have it grow requires time, patience and determination…this does not mean you lock yourself in a room until you get it right. It does mean that you need to evaluate the things that are most important to you – what do you want for yourself now and what do you want for yourself 10 years from now? (Doing 3-year and 5-year increments are also very helpful!). You are setting goals for yourself, finish lines that you need to reach in order to get to the next level and each level gets you closer to that life you’ve always dreamed of having. Tell yourself exactly what you want, if you could have anything for your business, what would it be? From there, work backwards to fill in the spaces until your entire map is complete. Just by doing this, you are already making a huge change in your life! Now, cut your map into smaller chunks and one by one you will tackle them, getting you closer to that bigger thing you were always meant to do. It’s like planning your wedding – as a whole, it’s terrifying, its overwhelming, but when you break it into monthly “to-do’s” it is so achievable that if it didn’t cost so much you would plan a million weddings!
It is important to comprehend that if we all stayed mediocre, we would have a very boring world – people push to become larger than life, to change the world they came into and to achieve their wildest dreams. It’s definitely a challenge, not an easy one in any way, but it’s one that will not only bring you true joy but also inspire those around you.
Convincing yourself to finally take a plunge and follow your destiny is way easier said than done. It’s terrifying allowing yourself to remove the safety net before you jump off the tallest cliff you’ve ever stood upon, but that drop isn’t really a drop at all, it’s more of a wind tunnel that teaches you to fly!
Training your mindset to turn your fear into something that challenges you rather than paralyze you from achieving your truth is the most powerful transformation you could do for yourself. A simple switch can open so many new doors for you – including the ability to allow yourself to take chances and to actually listen to what your gut is trying to tell you. Working backwards on your business strategy “map” works wonders, it’s a fill-in-the-blanks method that ends up being more fun rather than daunting and by breaking it up into pieces makes it so much more achievable.
History and studies both show that those who play on the edge, where things are uncomfortable, are the ones that are the most successful. Just remember, whenever you are trying to work towards your dreams, it’s never easy. And it shouldn’t be. Stay focused on what you can control and depend on yourself. If there is something that is pulling you towards a dream, don’t fight it, it will force you into a life of regret. Take action.
I got my WPIC certification in 2018 and fully took the plunge myself in 2019 leaving my day job to fulfill my life as an entrepreneur. I travelled many different paths before finding my way to weddings and events including running a cake company in 2013 and performing as a Disney Princess for children’s parties. I think that is where my love for behind-the-scenes-magic stems from.
Today, I find pure joy in creating effortless perfection for a multitude of events. The fact that I get to tap into so many different peoples’ minds to make their dreams come to life is exhilarating. The one thing I used to always get in trouble for as a kid, talking too much, is the one thing that allows me to connect with my clients so they feel comfortable enough to share their dreams with me. I pride myself on being able to build relationships with my clients and gain their trust as they put their vision in my hands to nurture and grow before their eyes.