WPIC Tip: Respect Thy Vendors

by Danielle Andrews Sunkel

Tracey and I used to be flattered when vendors would come to us at the end of the night and say, “You are the best planners I’ve worked with!”, “You’ve changed my opinion of wedding planners.”, “You are so easy to work with!”  Now that it happens at EVERY single wedding, I have to wonder:  What the heck are others doing???

I have seen why vendors are leery, I’ve been at multi-venue sites when the drill-sergeant planners are working weddings and I have also been on the receiving end of the grateful staff who try extra hard at my wedding, because they are so happy I respect and appreciate them. 😉

There seems to be a school of thought that in order to keep order, you need to be miserable with all the staff and vendors.  I heard a famous Event Planner say at a conference recently , “No one ever got ahead by being nice.”  What complete and utter bull!

How dare anyone go into a venue and yell at the staff there!  How dare they yell at the other vendors! How dare anyone make someone else’s job miserable!  How dare anyone risk poor service for their couple!  Fear does not create better service, respect does.

Too many times I have been met with opposition before I even smile and say “Hello”, because some misguided, insecure individual has ruined that vendor’s idea of what a Wedding Planner is.  Yes, the Wedding Planner is the main representative for the couple, you are the team leader, but you are NOT their boss.  You have no right to tell them how to do their job, you make the schedule, but you do not run their business.  Every single person working at a wedding has a very important job to do on the couple’s “Most important day of their life.”  In order for the vendors and their staff to be motivated to provide great customer service, you need to represent your couple in the best possible way, by making them feel appreciated.  Let them do the job they were hired to do, so that they let you do yours.

The backlash has started to happen, venues are starting to say “No” to outside planners, others are outright banning particular planners or they are being passive aggressive and saying dates are booked up when planners call for availability.

A good wedding planner makes everyone’s job easier and enjoyable, a miserable drill sergeant makes everyone’s job more difficult and in the end hurts their couple’s experience.  If you aren’t a people person, get out of the business.  So my colleagues, smarten up and stop ruining the reputation of Wedding Planners, all you are doing is ruining your own industry.

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