Is Your Ego Getting in Your Way?

by Danielle Andrews, President and Co-founder of The Wedding Planners Institute of Canada Inc.

There has been a lot of talk about Imposter Syndrome lately and just not feeling good enough. On the flipside, I’ve seen a lot of people thinking they are too good, or worth more than what their experience and expertise warrant. After almost 25 years in the wedding industry, I’ve witnessed ego being the downfall of several wedding professionals. So I ask, is your ego getting in your way?

If you are charging a great price, and getting booked solid, amazing! You can stop reading, I’m not talking to you. But… if you are not booking clients at the rates you are trying to charge, this may be the straight talk you need.

A common thing I have heard from Wedding Professionals lately is, “That Wedding Vendor is not at my level”, or “They are only going to get published in such and such magazine, that’s not my niche”. Let’s have a little reality check, shall we? If YOU are not getting published in such and such magazine, and YOUR books aren’t full of clients of such and such calibre, are you really at that level? Or are you just trying to be? The funniest thing to me lately is all the people claiming to be self-taught, when they were just in our classroom a few years ago. (I’m not sure when being uneducated became a selling feature??) You are not self-taught, you gained on-the-job experience after getting educated and becoming certified. Just like every professional, in every profession.

Are you getting in your own way by believing you are something that you are not? Every Wedding Coach loves to tout, “Charge what you’re worth!”, “Raise Your Prices!” but if no one is paying those prices, what good is it doing you? Are you really worth that amount? You are only worth what people in your market are willing to pay. And if no one will pay what you are charging, it’s time to come back down to reality.

Pitfalls of an Inflated Ego:

1. Comparison Trap: Believing you’re superior to other vendors or that certain publications are beneath you can lead to missed opportunities. Remember, every vendor and publication has its unique audience and value. Instead of dismissing others, focus on how you can collaborate or improve your own offerings.
2. Overpricing: While it’s essential to value your services appropriately, an inflated ego can lead to overpricing. If clients aren’t willing to pay the rates you’re asking for, it’s time to reassess your value proposition. Charging what you’re worth is about aligning with market demand, not just personal perception.
3. Resistance to Feedback: A big ego can make it challenging to accept constructive criticism or feedback from clients, peers, or mentors. This resistance stunts professional growth and prevents you from refining your skills and services.
4. Lack of Adaptability: Holding onto a rigid image of yourself or your business can hinder adaptation to market trends or client preferences. Flexibility and willingness to evolve are essential for long-term success in the dynamic wedding industry.

Checklist to Assess Your Ego:

1. Client Feedback Analysis: Are you genuinely listening to client feedback and implementing necessary changes, or do you dismiss it because you believe your way is the best?
2. Market Research: Have you conducted thorough market research to understand what clients are willing to pay for services similar to yours? Are your prices aligned with market standards and client expectations?
3. Collaboration Mentality: Do you view other vendors as competitors to be outdone, or do you seek opportunities for collaboration and mutual growth?
4. Openness to Learning: Are you actively seeking opportunities for learning and improvement, or do you believe you already know everything you need to know?
5. Honest Self-Reflection: Can you objectively assess your strengths and weaknesses, or do you only focus on highlighting your strengths?

By honestly evaluating these points, you can gain clarity on whether your ego is playing a detrimental role in your business. Remember, humility, openness, and a willingness to adapt are key ingredients for long-term success in the wedding industry. So, let’s check our egos at the door and focus on delivering exceptional experiences for our clients.